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May
28, 2009 Transcript Luke: You're making a big mistake here. I want to see my attorney. Holly: This is outrageous. I didn't steal anything from anybody -- [Luke laughs] Holly: Lately. Luke: Natasha, tell your goons to set us loose, will you? You know I only do the handcuff thing for fun and games. Alexis: Riley, what did he do this time? Tracy: Allow me. I'd like to bring charges against Miss Sutton. The gentleman is, and I use the word advisedly, innocent. Riley: But he's her accomplice. They were together in the hotel. Tracy: So you cheated on me with her after she told you she played you for a fool? Even your precious dodger can see right through her. Alexis: Who's dodger? Luke: I didn't go to her room for sex. I went for information. Holly: We were having a lovely chat until you decided to send in local law enforcement. I'd like to speak to Commissioner Scorpio, please. He'll understand that I've been framed. Alexis: Framed for what? Tracy: Actually, she tried to extort money from me and my husband, and when we refused, she stole my sapphire necklace. Holly: That's absurd. Tracy: It's missing. Luke: Did you check the bottom of the mattress? Tracy: I had no idea when the police went to arrest her that they would discover my husband there. Luke: Look, Spanky, English already told us that the dodger is not mine. You got what you wanted. Why are you pushing this? Alexis: Wait. Hold it. Who's Spanky? Who's dodger? Who's English? Luke: All right, let me explain this to you, Natasha. Riley: Who's Natasha? Luke: My wife, fueled by jealousy and pugnacious pride, is about to clog up your docket with a bunch of false accusations. You can flush it all away by refusing to press charges and just sending us home. Alexis: Here is what I am going to say as D.A. It really bugs me when people file false charges. Holly: Mac, my favorite former brother-in-law. Your timing's impeccable. Can you sort this out, please? Mac: I'm surprised to see you Holly, and you seem to be handcuffed. Holly: Yeah, things have gotten a little complicated. Mac: I bet. Well, whatever trouble you're in, I know Robin will be thrilled to see you. Holly: Robin's back? Riley: You are free to go. Tracy: Try to look grateful, Luke. Luke: I'll look grateful when you drop the phony charges against Holly. Tracy: Miss Sutton stole my sparkling sapphire stones, and I want her prosecuted to the fullest extent of the law. Oh, deportation works for me. Luke: You know, Natasha, before you start building that case against Miss Sutton, you might want to talk to me because I have some very interesting information about possible future litigation. Alexis: Please don't come back. May I recommend therapy? Luke: If you're here to arrest me, could you just hang on long enough for me to get hammered so that I don't actually fold in the middle? Alexis: When I left the station, Holly and Tracy were bitch-slapping each other. We were going to throw them in the cage, but it was full. Alexis: Did you really think that Ethan was your son? Luke: Yeah, I still do. Maybe I'm wrong. Maybe I just want him to be. Maybe I'm just a ridiculous old fool. But between my jealous wife and the disreputable Miss Sutton, it's really hard to know which end is up these days. Alexis: You know, for a guy who never really wanted kids in the first place, it's ironic that you're this eager for a third. Luke: Yeah, I know it is, but I guess I've changed. Near-death experiences, living with a broken, damaged heart after two or three coronaries I guess will do that to you. Alexis: Oh, I get that. I mean, being faced with your own mortality does make you shift your priorities. Luke: You know, my first tango with the grim reaper, he danced all over my feet. And now it seems like all I'm left with is this constant, nagging notion that the best of everything is behind me. Lost youth, lost opportunity, and now I see nothing ahead but limited possibilities and limited time. I don't know, maybe I'm just -- maybe I'm just really loving the idea of having a kid who actually likes me, who looks up to me instead of down on me. Maybe I like the idea of having a kid who wants to hang out with me because he thinks that I can teach him something important. Maybe I needed that and didn't realize it.
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